Ella began to make plans for her Mother’s burial despite how sad and lonely she felt, she still wanted to give her Mother a befitting burial so she left no stone unturned. The Pastor and members of the church she and her Mum attended visited her and told her they would support her in any way they could. Ella was glad for the support but she could do without their sympathies and words of encouragement because they were hurting more than helping. They kept saying she should accept God’s will and quoted verses like “the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh”. All their words did was to strengthen her resolve to have nothing to do with a God who did random acts of cruelty and called it “his will”; she will be fine on her own.
Some days before the burial, everyone kept asking her one question,
“Are there any relatives we can contact?”
And she always answered that there were none. This too was another source of pain for Ella because her mother had grown and lived in an orphanage all her life until she went to the University and met her Father. Ella’s Father was from a very wealthy family, his parents did not support their relationship because she was a nobody and did not belong in their social circle but when he insisted, they gave in. Ella’s parents got married and a few days shy of their 1st wedding anniversary, she was born and their joy knew no bounds.
Few months later, tragedy struck; Ella’s dad was killed in a plane crash on a business trip overseas. His plane had dropped into the sea, it was never found and his body too, even though some bodies and scraps from the plane were found. Ella’s mum was devastated; here she was a new mum now a widow and they could not find her husband’s corpse too. She got very little comfort from his family; they had always been cold to her but with her husband’s death, they became brutal. They kicked her out of her home and told her never to return, when she pleaded with them and told them to think of their granddaughter Ella, they laughed saying she was a girl, only a boy mattered to them.
Ella couldn’t be angry at the family she didn’t know, she could not contact them even if she wanted to. Her Mother had told her the story but refused to reveal the identity of her grandparents, she said it was all in the past and she had forgiven them and moved on. That was one of the things that hurt her most, her mother was such a kind and forgiving person who life had treated so badly yet she always had a positive and happy disposition. Since Ella did not know her dad’s family and her mother was raised in orphanage, she was going to bury her Mother with no family member present.
When the day of the burial dawned, it was as gloomy as Ella felt, it rained throughout that day as if the sky was weeping for her loss. When the rain would not let up or show signs of stopping, the burial was done in the rain. Through the programme Ella functioned by default, her eyes were dry, she felt like her tear ducts had dried up from crying so much. When her mother’s casket was being lowered into the grave, something in her snapped, she realized the finality of her mother’s death and with a loud cry she fell to her knees. The pastor’s wife who had been standing beside her, knelt by her and held her, she helped her pour sand on the casket and when they began to cover the grave with sand, Ella felt the ground give way under her.